Religion

I grew up following the catholic religion.  My second foster family got me into it and that was how I coped for many years.   In my 20’s, I broke free from all of it.  I got to a point where I was asking myself why bad things were always happening to me despite praying the majority of my life.  It became a waste of time.  At that point, I decided that I was going to give it all up.  I figured I would challenge God and he would have to prove to me that he was real.  I figured something awful would happen to me, but at that point, my life couldn't get any worse than it already was.  I even cried when I did it as it was like taking everything I had ever believed in and burning it.  I had to reason with myself and feel assured that I was doing the right thing.  I looked at situations of torture, rape, murder, kidnapping, hostage situations, etc.  This affirmed to me that I was making the right choice because I couldn't help but wonder where their God was at.   How could God let innocent humans go through such brutal things?  I'm sure someone is going to want to give me their reasoning for this, but I can assure you I have already heard it all.

Honestly, breaking free from religion was one of the best things I ever did.  I see the world for what it is now and all it did was give me a false sense of security.  My life instantly became better than it had ever been.  I will play the part, support it, and go along with it.  I get that it is how some people cope and I respect that.  I found what works and religion just isn't for me.     

I do understand that many do still follow religion and there is nothing wrong with that.  I get that it helps some people cope in life and allows them to sleep at night.  You have to do what is best for you.   I have tried religion and it is not the best for me.  My life has been a million times better without it.   I now see myself as being solely responsible for everything I do and anything that happens to me.  Anything good in my life is because of my efforts and work that I did to get where I’m at.  Nobody and nothing is going to take that credit from me. 

 

I bring this up because I know this is a huge deal to some people and I would be lying if I said I am into it.   Again, I will support it and play the part.  It just isn't for me on a personal level.